Hello everyone. I'm StarStorm, but feel free to call me Star. I'd much prefer you call me God. Anyway, I have been fortuitous enough to have Macc allow me to be a guest host on FARTS.

Meaning I've been put in a containment unit once again (which isn't terribly original I might add), and he's put Slave Crowns on most of the FARTS staff.

That's enough of you. HEY! Gilgamesh, get the camera off of Macc and onto me!

Yes master...

Now then. Today, we will be interviewing failed Square villains. Namely Golbez, Gestahl, and... um...

Let me guess, you haven't found a third.

Considering, Macc, that there are plenty of wanna-be bad guys who screwed up totally in the execution of their nefarious plans and now have been cast off and are desperately seeking exposure, it should be no problem. I'm just not familiar with any.

Did you actually BREATHE when you said that?

Nope. *gasp* *inhale*

Offhand, I do notice that Dark Macc is neither wearing a Slave Crown and is not currently in a containment unit. Why is that?

You know Macc, you really shouldn't point out holes in the plot like that. But ok, I'll make up an explanation you'll have to live with for now. Basically I managed to knock him out and rewire him so his weapon and movement arrays are completely nonfunctional. *gasp* *inhale*

Meaning you were too cheap to buy another containment unit.

That's about it. Besides, Doppler didn't have any.

Not only is he evil, but he's lazy and cheap to boot. I REALLY would like to know how he managed to knock me out.

You know what Dark Macc? You need to stop pointing out blatant plot holes too. Why didn't I rewire your vocal arrays too?

You needed an annoying co-host?

Thanks. I would like to note that I'm supposed to be Macc's annoying co-host.

Do you like being Macc's annoying co-host?

Why do you think I spend so much time trying to take over FARTS?

Then quit complaining.

Why? I doubt you're much better than he is.

*sweatdrop* Macc, do you mind if I administer electroshock to your evil twin?


Before you seriously think about it, I would like you to know that in your containment unit, I had a device installed that is a very effective barricade against pretty much anything, going in or out. You don't breathe or eat, as far as I know, which saves me a murder charge. Until I let you out or you escape, which will probably be never, you won't feel a thing I do to him. *gasp* *inhale*

Then how am I talking to you?

Mike and speaker arrays. Can I please fry Dark Macc now?

I'm probably going to regret it, but knock yourself out.

HEY! *bzzzzzzzzzt*

Cool! You think you can kill him for me?

Nah, I don't feel like killing, and besides, you don't want me to, because if that thing shuts down you die.

DAMN! So why did you install the device?

*shrug* Cheap physical humor, besides, I don't want to find out if you have anything that'll let you escape. Remote control and stuff like that.

What about voice controlled?

Do you have anything voice controlled?

I don't know. Did Merlin get that new security system installed yet?

Zeromus, is the new security system installed?

No Master.


Damn. Anyway, why don't you try shocking Ultros? He's used for physical humor.

Hmm alright. Hey Ultros!

Yes Master? *bzzzzzzzzzt* Ouch.

That wasn't as much fun as I thought it would be. I was hoping he would kick and scream too. Maybe it's the Slave Crown..

Figures. He doesn't even show any initiative with a Slave Crown on.

Lost an idea for making your staff better?

*takes out a pencil and notepad, and scratches "Use Slave Crowns" from the list*

So much for that idea. Oh! Hey! Might as well get started, beats hearing you two complain. Ultros, change the music, please. We're expecting Gestahl.

Yes Master.

Well, what are you waiting for? More! More!